Graduation. Commencement. Baccalaureate. Whatever you want to call it, it's a big deal. It's a recognition and celebration of a 12 year achievement. It's the ending of one thing and the beginning of something else, something new, and most likely, something bigger.
It's a little weird to think that I am graduating this year. Little more than a month, rather! It's crazy. I've always wanted to be here: on the brink of finishing this four-year trial through fire we call high school; what I thought would be the hardest years of my life. In seventh grade, I looked at the seniors and whoa. THEY were awesome. They were the people I wanted to be like, to hang out with, to notice me. So mature, and having it all together, they were starting a life as an adult. I didn't recognize that their maturity and 'having it all together' was because they persevered through high school and had learned hard lessons. I thought they were just like that; just awesome. Haha... Wow. I had no idea. Now that I'm in the place I looked up to, I can see how incredibly wrong I was. I sin now more than I did then. There's no such thing as 'having it all together' and mature? HA! Not. There are so many parts of growing up that I saw as 'secondary' to becoming an adult. I thought being an adult was about being free from the confines of school (what did I think about college?), getting your own car and driving wherever and whenever you wanted (car payments, gas, and insurance?), hanging out with your friends all the time (job? career?), no one to tell you what to do (or guide you) or where to be. Whatever I thought this time in my life would look like, it wasn't too much of a shock when it finally came (other than how fast it came) because I have two incredible parents. They nipped my perception of growing up in the bud. They told me that being an adult is way more than the fun things. It's hard. There's growing. There's stretching. There's trials. There's failure. But. In the midst of all the 'harsh' realities of adulthood, there is hope. There's grace. There's blessings. Because there's a Savior and a helper.
I still don't feel ready to be an adult. I mean, I'm SO ready to be done with high school (and ALL that implies), don't get me wrong. But I'm so immature. I am irresponsible. I don't feel like I've prepared well enough. Instead of laying a foundation that will act as a springboard into my future, I feel like I've just gotten by, by the skin of my teeth. Now I believe these next years will be the hardest ones yet. I have so many habits and character flaws to tear down and then reconstruct. It's going to be hard work. Harder than I think or want. But I know that it's often in the times that seem the hardest that the bear the most fruit, show the most growth. I am so excited about what's ahead. About my future. All that God has planned for me. I'm a little intimidated because I think it's going to be big. I think God has plans for me that I can't even imagine now. THAT is what I'm excited about. Growing closer to God, learning more about Him, affecting people for his glory.
All of that to say I am a senior and senior's need pictures and I got my senior pictures done. Despite the overwhelming number of people who asked me, I did NOT shoot my own seniors. Haha, no. Actually, it was the fulfillment of a dream for me to have the incredible Jamie Delaine come to the backwoods of North Carolina and take my senior pictures. I'm so grateful that she was willing to endure the 17hr travel days to do this for me. I not only had an awesomely fun time with her, but I feel pretty when I look at these images and that means the world to me. So thank you Jamie. It means a lot to me. (And thanks for blogging so I could steal these to blog :D )
Please head over to Jamie's blog to see the rest of the images and make sure to check out the slideshow! Some of my favorite images are in the slideshow. (Gosh, now I feel really vain posting pics of me on my blog... )